We all have fears. Some feel real, like for example, fear of spiders. Others we attach to life situations, creating the possibility of worse-case scenario, like fear of loss of job. What we learn as we go through life is that the spiritual journey, our life journey, requires courage. Spirit teaches us to face and overcome our fears with courage.
When we last left Spider-man, he was halfway up the Washington Monument on his way to save his classmates from mortal danger. The timeline for mortal danger had shifted from 10 minutes to 125 seconds. Spider-man was on his way to the southwest window.
Spiderman arrives and is freaked out. When he makes it to the top of the Washington Monument, he hesitates. His fear is palpable. He has never been this high before. Spider-man has to dig deep to find his courage.
He attempts to break the window is a weak kick.
Karen (the voice of his spider-suit) alerts him to that face that he will need more force to break the window as the glass is 4 inches thick. He takes deep breathes, uses his web-shooter to lean off the monument, jumps away from the monument and hits the window with more force. Spider-man continues jumping out and against the window attempting to break it.
The Spiritual Journey
Fear of Spider
When I was a kid, I was massively afraid of spiders. If there was a spider in the room. I left. It might take days before I went back into that room. When I did, I stayed away from where the spider was.
I used to shout for my dad to come help me whenever there was a spider on the ceiling. Many times he would stand there asking where it was. I would point to a tiny dot. He was like, “That’s a mark on the ceiling.” I knew better and would make him wait until the dot moved. Indeed it was a spider. He needed to remove it. The dot (spider) always moved to prove my point.
When I moved to Taos, NM for a nine month sabbath, Spider decided to teach me about courage. I was alone. There was no one to deal with spiders for me. So the first time a spider showed up, I had to deal with it.
I will admit, it was probably hilarious to watch that moment: Me, standing there, speaking out loud to that spider and explaining that it needed to leave right now! When it did not comply with my request, shaking from head to toe I dropped a plastic container over it, trapping it on the floor.
I spent the remainder of the day walking around that plastic container as Spider sat waiting patiently for me to deal with it. Stomping and killing the spider freaked me out more than sliding a paper underneath and dragging it to the door. So, I slipped paper underneath and dragged the spider to the door. I tipped the plastic container outward forcing the spider to leave the house.
Then I walked through the house explaining to any other spiders that they were not welcome in my house!
Well, Spirit was destined to teach me about courage. So, the next day guess what I awoke to? A spider at the foot of my bed. Again and again I was trapping and removing spiders from the house. My courage was building. I could get close enough to drop the plastic container over them without shaking.
"Yeah," said Spirit. My lesson in courage continued. Now Spider began to show up on the wall. I had to trap, slide the paper under it, and carry the spider outside. No longer could I drag the paper.
Fear to Curiosity
When I got used to that, a spider showed up in the window. I was semi-afraid of it. But something would not let me remove it. Something had me curious. I watched as day after day it created this amazing knoll and spiderweb. I let it live there.
One morning, I received an invitation to create a High Desert Essence of Spider. I took a bottle to that particular spider. Set the bottle nearby. Left it. I noticed that Spider incorporated the bottle into her web. The bottle stayed there until I noticed that Spider had left. The web was empty. The medicine, the essence was complete.
Am I not afraid of Spider anymore? No. I still have a slight tinge of fear when spider shows up on the floor or wall or wherever. But, I can stand in my power now. I can trap and remove the spider.
The gift of Courage
It was a process that taught me a great deal about the growth of my courage. Spirit guided me each step of the way, giving me opportunities to grow and become more courageous. When I found my courage, I experience curiosity instead of fear. That curiosity created an amazing blessing and gift.
Spider High Desert Essence:
“Enter into my hollow and learn to spin and weave the threads of your life into an intricate and magnificent tapestry (web). Your tapestry, your web, is your home, your hearth, your heart. Once we have woven it I will teach you the art, the practice, the skills of attracting, catching, repairing, nourishing and birthing; as well as, non-attachment — the inner knowing of when to tear it down and re-weave it (your hearth, your heart, your home).
The foundation of this work is the opening, enhancing and integration of your psychic senses: hearing, touching/feeling, smelling, seeing, tasting across the veil. As your psychic senses open and integrate you will spin vibrant color filled (golden and more) threads that weave a multi-dimensional cosmic tapestry.”
How is Spirit offering you the gift of courage today?
Pastor Jocelyn Emerson weaves together her training as a Light and Energy worker, Reiki master, spiritual director, and Pastor with her life experience as a mystic and contemplative to offer a space of trust, safety, and honesty to support you on your life's journey.