Sara Bessey’s 40 Simple Practices for Lent, day 23: Tell someone you trust the truth you’ve been holding back.
As I read the instructions for this day, Teresa of Avila’s Interior Castle came to mind. I have recently been diving deeply into her understanding of our Soul and the Sacred imaged as an Interior Castle. In Teresa’s image, there are seven dwellings. Each dwelling takes you closer and closer to the center, to the Sacred, to Oneness.
To get into the dwelling in the first place, we must enter it through prayer and meditation. Once we are in the first dwelling we learn that progression further into the dwellings depends upon a few things: humility, trust, self-understanding, and learning to stay centered in the chaos around you.
Here is Sara Bessey inviting us to deepen trust, as well as humility. Sharing of secrets with another creates a feeling of vulnerability, an inner fear of humiliation. Once the secret is shared, once it is heard without judgment, once the secret is no longer a secret, we recognize that our fear of humiliation was actually a fear connected to something deeper in our psyche, something blocking us from trusting fully, from being humble.
Feel the release of telling a secret for a moment. Bring to mind a moment you shared something secret—something you were afraid to share with another. Allow yourself to feel the beforehand: the fear, the ways in which you tried to talk yourself out of sharing, all of those emotions. Feel them for a few moments.
Then allow yourself to feel the after. Feel the release of the secret. Feel what happens in your body and spirit. Was the weight lifted? Did something shift in your heart? Was some dense heaviness released? Did you experience growing inner freedom?
Notice what happened. Offer a few moments of gratitude for this re-membering—that humility and trust offer us a path to greater inner freedom, to deeper connection with the Sacred.
Now, prayerfully consider what “secret” is currently holding you back, holding you hostage. Is it time to share it with a trusted friend, therapist, spiritual director, pastor, family member, etc.? What do you need to instill within yourself to obtain the courage to share it?
When you are ready, share it. Share it prayerfully. Share it with great humility. Share it with understanding that the Sacred is inviting you to healing, to freedom. Share it from your heart, with no judgement upon yourself.
May you feel the Sacred’s embrace as you share this secret.
May you know God’s mercy and grace through the sharing of this secret.
May you find a deeper Presence of the Holy as you share this secret.
Pastor Jocelyn Emerson weaves together her training as a Light and Energy worker, Reiki master, spiritual director, and Pastor with her life experience as a mystic and contemplative to offer a space of trust, safety, and honesty to support you on your life's journey.